it’s fucked up that ~99% of the stories i read about men hitting on women are stories of male celebrities getting metoo’d. idk where i’m supposed to be getting role models and positive examples from. any women wanna tell us about a time a man hit on them and they liked it?
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I wanna chalk their success up to charm but honestly rules 1 and 2 are the entire game for getting "ruled in" as a sexual prospect
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these rules?
okay but what does this meeean tho this feels tautologously true? most of my life i was convinced that “attractive” was like 99% physical appearance and now i’m convinced that at least for men it isn’t but this doesn’t say anything about what it *is*
be confident, fit, have a good social circle, work on things you’re passionate about, be talented, have lots of money, etc
ianaw but it seems like male attractiveness to women is much more variable and situation dependent than the reverse
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basically women are attracted to agency and competence. Be a high-status guy! Impressing people is the whole trick. It's tough and complex operationally but strategically simple
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in this order 1) hot on a visceral level (lots of different bodies can qualify but fitness is obviously a big plus here) 2) not so socially retarded as to be a liability 3) confident
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twitter.com/forgingtowards
"be confident" expands to "have good posture, situational awareness, don't hyperfocus"
but also
don't be hyper invested in it going super well
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Replying to @sonyasupposedly
the old advice is right, when you correct for the performative nature of reality,
rule 1) do attractiveness
rule 2) do not do unattractiveness
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you ask "How do I know if the woman is interested or attracted before hitting on?"
and "be confident" in large part is advice to *operate skillfully under that uncertainty*
with a prior that, as an attractive/intelligent/conscientious person, the person is likely interested
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ofc happening to find you attractive is great, but not sth to worry about imo. I've been happy/comfortable w advances from ppl I didn't find attractive. Main factor is whether it seems "personal": do we have common interests, engaging conversation? Random/scattershot is unwelcome
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literally did not say this
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