i complained about a thing so much i got tired of my own complaints which i think is my new favorite self-improvement strategy
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i think i was undervaluing boredom as a force for change. run the existing strategy into the ground enough that you get bored of it and after the boredom space opens up for something else. repeatedly experiencing the strategy helps me notice how dead vs. alive it feels
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one of the funnier symptoms of anxious attachment from the attachment course is “talks too much and goes off on tangents a lot” and i’ve been thinking about that
i think this is an attempt to process past stuff that doesn’t really get a chance to complete most of the time
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it doesn’t complete bc mostly conditions are not right to say the things that most want / need to be said, and also bc for social reasons other people might shut you up or you might shut yourself up before you get enough time to say all the things. need wayfinding + time
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anyway concrete proposal is to try journaling a shitton but if, like me, you find writing privately unmotivating, next proposal is to rant a lot on a locked alt. the higher your follower count gets on main the more stabilizing having a small locked alt becomes imo
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(Sorry if I’m saying an obvious (or me-specific) thing but) I relate to this thing a lot, and nothing written has helped nearly as much as finding individual people who were actually down to listen to me to completion.
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that makes sense! i am usually too uncomfortable asking a specific person to listen to me to do that 😅
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Well I’m happy to try if you want!
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Prediction: even (/especially?) with concrete offers, it feels sort of terrifying and like there has to be some (unacceptably bad?) catch?
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Replying to
you got me 😅 it’s true that several people have made offers and i have taken almost none of them up on it
actually maybe literally none
i feel like i need specific things from a listener and it’s hard for me to ask for those things. only a few people provide them spontaneously
Replying to
Well naturally I’m interested in what those things are if you’re up for sharing!
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I would also like to know what makes it har for ask for the stuff if you’re up for sharing. I have a few different guesses about that...
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