Conversation

QC (in Berlin 7/29-???)
@QiaochuYuan
"a lot" could mean very different things to different people so i counted. 17 DMs, mostly men but also some trans / queer women tbc i appreciate this a lot, DMs are really good, it really helps me get a better sense of how much of a thing this is for people other than me
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eigenrobot
@eigenrobot
ok so replying to this here. this sucks and im sorry dude. and I have gotten feedback about this from female partners in the past. i dont know how to convey the mindset that is a way around it but i think the big thing is to just be really present. vibing. in the following sense
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eigenrobot
@eigenrobot
actively worrying about what you are doing during sex is totally inimical to this. theres really no situation where vibe is more shared and apparent than during sex and if you go in stressed its just gonna suck most likely, for everyone
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eigenrobot
@eigenrobot
i do not think this is unusual for men either. the information I have received is that in fact men worry a Lot and pretty generally
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eigenrobot
@eigenrobot
i dont exactly know how to explain how to not worry and just focus on enjoying things but I think its the ideal end state. probably being Aware is a start, also finding a partner who is chill and open to helping you feel relaxed
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