for a certain kind of person, admitting they want status is the closest they can get to admitting that they want intimacy
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there’s a kind of edgelord quality to admitting you want status that can be fun to lean into. there’s nothing edgelord about admitting you want intimacy. it’s intensely vulnerable. you’re in real danger of becoming emotionally naked
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i wonder also if there’s something aggressive about the way we’re taught to want. at least here in the US, when you want something you’re supposed to force the universe to give it to you. perhaps we correctly intuit that something feels off about applying this to intimacy
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aggression born of conditioned entitlement. in US ethos victory is owed to us, & defeat is injustice
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i feel like westerners tend to have a "front", a projection of strength, which makes it harder to be vulnerable.
kids can be cute. animals can be cute. but cute adults isn't a common thing in the west. can be kind of offensive.
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I have no difficulty applying this to intimacy. Perhaps relatedly, I feel that society is in many ways trying to stop me from achieving intimacy so my pursuit of it feels like a battle. for example when I act cute or exercise polyamory.