this feels slightly douchey but i’ve gotten enough people sliding into my DMs that i might write a guide to how to slide into someone’s DMs. maybe you wrote something like this already?
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i get enough DM requests now that the only way i can deal with them all is basically to reject any that make me feel uncomfortable even if i can’t articulate the feeling. it’s given me a lot more sympathy for what i imagine being a woman on a dating site is like
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some patterns i’ve noticed in DM requests i feel uncomfortable about:
1) inappropriate intimacy, e.g. talking as if we’re close friends if you only know me parasocially (i was surprised by how uncomfortable this felt)
2) very unclear ask, e.g. sending me a rant
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3) big ask without a proportionate introduction or sell, e.g. “can we be friends” without an intro or explanation, bruh buy me dinner first
4) various miscellaneous flags for “this person won’t be fun to talk to / doesn’t understand social norms / is possibly quite disturbed”
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I suppose the “DM’s open!” bio doesn’t help lol
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i’m still glad it’s there and i don’t wanna change it! but i am getting a wider variety than i used to and i am learning how to deal with it lol