ok so: the is/ought problem, but for feelings
x happens
I feel angry
wait, before the anger is fear
wait, there is sadness, then fear, then anger
why is "sadness" where the rubber meets the road?
is it "x happens; associatively retrieve related memory y; feel those feelings"?
Conversation
but how did I have the feelings in y? infinite regress?
maybe emotional system doesn't distinguish retrieved memory from present? so this problem only shows up when u react to the past instead of the present, but it is also possible to react to the present?
2
3
the way lays it out in the bio-emotive framework is like this: prior to emotions like “sad” or “angry” something happens to you and you have an “interpersonal feeling” about it, e.g. “betrayed” or “abandoned”; often projections / flashbacks to past stuff
2
2
interpersonal feelings in turn trigger core feelings which trigger emotions
so a full-stack example: gf didn’t respond to my texts ➡️ feel abandoned ➡️ feel worthless ➡️ feel sad or scared or angry or all three
2
2
ohhh I did hear this, but it didn't click, thanks for the example
1
1
yw! fwiw an obstacle i had to deal with here was that interpersonal feelings are all Very Dramatic and there was a way in which i like... didn’t think my problems were serious enough to warrant them? turns out my feelings don’t care about that rho 😅
1
3
ohhh yeah all my feelings feel dramatic and out of proportion, that has been hard to get over
2
3
no kiddin, life-and-death right there
lockdownbrain can feel like u have indeed been left behind at some waterhole... its natural that it feels so dramatic
(obv natural doesn't nec. equal good or helpful, but i find it can help a bit with the urge to beat myself up for feeling so intensely at times)
3