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oh, i guess more specific than this: it viscerally confuses me when people are nice to me *after i have revealed myself to be incompetent* it does ‘t confuse me when people are nice to me after i have done a cool thing
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like... my system experiences you as trying to argue me out of having a feeling because you’re convinced you know the feeling is wrong and what the right feeling should be that does not work for me. it just makes me resist the feeling instead of accepting it
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if it helps i can try to reassure you by constructing you a 100-tweet thread of quote tweets of all the times I ask innocent curious questions, both in the abstract, and in conversations 😅
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