I feel like people theorising the link between kinks and trauma often miss the point. You don't need complex theories to explain why someone is into a particular kink - it's just fun. What you need to explain is why people are stuck in a particular range of fun things.
Conversation
i don’t understand this. what does it mean for something to be “just fun”? i don’t experience hardly anything as “just fun”
3
15
I don't mean that it's "just fun" in the sense that it has no other emotional dynamics involved, I mean that the fun is a sufficient explanation for being into it.
As to what that means... it's a physically pleasurable creative social activity. What's not to like?
1
3
the way i interpret your language you’re talking as if fun is an intrinsic property of activities and that doesn’t make ontological sense to me. obviously some things are fun for some people and not others and that’s exactly the phenomenon under investigation
2
8
most of the common kink stuff is stuff i would not find fun personally, i don’t find pain fun, i don’t find degradation fun in either direction, etc. in my view there’s a lot to be explained here!
1
7
Do you also feel that there's a lot to be explained about why some people are into D&D and some people are into football?
1
7
some but less?
1
5
For what it's worth, I do think it's generally not that hard to understand why any given thing is fun, and it's usually not that complicated and for reasons that generalise. Individual variation is usually more down to whether you can / it's worth it to get into it.
4
6
Replying to
this is really not my experience of kink-flavored activities at all. i would find a lot of them not just unfun but slightly traumatizing to do
my experience of fun generally has very little to do with specific activities and a ton to do with other aspects of the social / emotional context; when i’m in a good mood and feel accepted and liked almost anything feels fun, in the opposite situation almost nothing feels fun
1
7
Replying to
I think it's probably worth separating out two things:
1. There are things in this that are fun.
2. There are things in this that I actively want to avoid.
The second doesn't preclude the first and I think has a lot more variation.
1
4
I feel like you're also looking at fairly extreme examples of kink? Like almost nobody jumps in at the deep end of pain and degradation kink, and there's already a lot of variation at entry level dom/sub stuff.
1
3
Show replies