Conversation

when you're feeling poorly, can people around you tell just by looking at you (if you don't make a show of it)?

yes
44%
only close friends/family
31.6%
no
24.4%

291 votesFinal results

i think basically everyone has this ability and lots of people are deliberately refusing to pay attention to it so it’s hard to tell if it’s happening

goblin à la mode

@goblinodds

oof sad i feel like some people are just very expressive when they're ill, though? 🤔 apparently my face just goes blank and i talk less, like i put less effort into being expressive for other people's benefit?

yeah that’s extremely noticeable if anyone would actually bother to notice it at all i went through this transition where i like... gave myself permission to notice other people’s faces and body language and it was horrifying. everyone around me was so anxious and so unhappy

8:52 PM · Aug 14, 2020Twitter for iPad

Replying to

and

nerds in particular vastly vastly underestimate how transparent their emotional state is to an even slightly practiced observer. it’s just that often the state is “blank and frozen and dissociated” which looks kinda like but is actually completely different from “neutral”

Replying to

oh yikes 😬 what was it like before you gave yourself permission? did you get the cues you needed for communication but not the extra information?

i just never allowed myself to look at people really. i’d look off to the side and sort of studiously avoid putting too much of my attention on anyone’s face or body. it felt rude

Show replies

Replying to

and

yeah I agree with this a lot after a while it gets easy to tell what others are feeling unless they're very practiced in hiding it -- but the kind of people that are good at that are social speakers, politicians, magicians, rogues of all types, and clever addicts. not nerds

void angel

@egregirls

to really hide what you're feeling, people often develop little rituals to actually put themselves into different mindsets and feelings, even if they can drop it on the fly later. nerds generally prize introspection and sincerity, which runs contra to that.

Show replies

Replying to

and

also not to be that guy again but the easiest way to grow up believing that other people can’t tell how you’re feeling is to have parents who never bothered to read and respond to your emotional state 😬 and then to be surrounded by other people who also had such parents 😬😬😬

noted wife lover srav

@thesravaka

just subtweet the entire british people at once, why don't you?

Replying to

and

Contra: the first time I experienced serious anxiety, to the point where I had trouble breathing or keeping my thoughts straights, I was really surprised that none of my coworkers/friends/wife could tell and those I told afterward were shocked to hear that.