Conversation

QC (in Berlin 7/29-??? w/ COVID 😷)
@QiaochuYuan
speaking of which, i occasionally wonder how much of the energy behind polyamory is due to romantic relationships being, in the US at least, the only normalized way to justify planning your life with someone you're not related to
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QC (in Berlin 7/29-??? w/ COVID 😷)
@QiaochuYuan
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Replying to @choosy_mom and @liminal_warmth
"hey guys you should definitely spend 4 years bonding deeply with each other and then scatter to the winds planning your lives separately unless you happen to also be having sex with each other"
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QC (in Berlin 7/29-??? w/ COVID 😷)
@QiaochuYuan
the first poly woman i dated told me, in tears, "i only make friends with people by dating them now" while we were having a conversation about my insecurities, and while it didn't do anything for my insecurities it's stuck with me
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QC (in Berlin 7/29-??? w/ COVID 😷)
@QiaochuYuan
there's some kind of concept of deep friendship that seems to me to be missing in american culture, and i really really don't like the way some queer discourse in particular consistently tries to sexualize historical same-gender intimacy, as if intimacy were necessarily sexual
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QC (in Berlin 7/29-??? w/ COVID 😷)
@QiaochuYuan
not that i particularly have a leg to stand on in my own friendships. i have left behind a lot of friends and i am not happy about it but i also don't know what to do. we weren't meant to try to maintain friendships without periodic *unplanned* physical contact
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