i think we've mostly forgotten how much those transitions sucked (those of us who went through them) but for me the transition from college to post-college in particular was such a jarring shock, i went from having all my social needs met to having none of them met
kinda fucked up how we’ve established that achievement and material accumulation are ultimately more important than our desire for meaningful community and a sense of place
"If someone is contacted less often than the defining rate for more than a few months, emotional closeness will inexorably decline to a level appropriate for the new contact rate"
This is why moving, graduate college, etc. suck so much—your entire graph recedes outward
i had a similarly jarring experience graduating college and i think it’s really shitty that my scene was forcibly disbanded by forces outside of our control
there’s a blogger @tynan who has been doing this for like a decade (and documenting in detail—he has 100s of posts!)
especially as i’ve noticed more people considering things like co-living and house hacking, i often wonder why he’s not more popular
https://tynan.com/tokyo