we normalized moving away from our high school communities to go to college then moving a second time away from our college communities to get a job
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i think we've mostly forgotten how much those transitions sucked (those of us who went through them) but for me the transition from college to post-college in particular was such a jarring shock, i went from having all my social needs met to having none of them met
and i've *never* gotten back to college levels of having social needs met, in 8 years!
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in college i would spend hours a day hanging out with my favorite people, literally every day, and i've *never* gotten a social environment as good as that for longer than, like, a week at a time since
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kinda fucked up how we’ve established that achievement and material accumulation are ultimately more important than our desire for meaningful community and a sense of place
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"If someone is contacted less often than the defining rate for more than a few months, emotional closeness will inexorably decline to a level appropriate for the new contact rate"
This is why moving, graduate college, etc. suck so much—your entire graph recedes outward
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i had a similarly jarring experience graduating college and i think it’s really shitty that my scene was forcibly disbanded by forces outside of our control
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