realized earlier today that i have a really strong desire to conceal things about me that are low-status, or to be especially open about them, in a ballsy way that actually grants me more status
not super surprising from the outside, but...
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itās always an op, even when i donāt consciously intend for it to be an op
but does it have to be? i donāt know
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tempted to experiment with just being low-status
but if i were to just say things that make me low-status, that would just benefit my status because of the bravery/ballsiness
guess iād have to reveal info reluctantly and shamefully for maximum cringe
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ok wait a minute, i think i can make this *deliciously* meta. so hereās a brief experiment. iām going to tell you the same (true!) information in two different ways and you can tell me what your visceral emotional reaction is
[CW: cringe content, based content]
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1. Iām a kissless virgin. Iāve never dated anyone or asked anyone out. For years, Iāve been lonely and horny most of the time, and read erotica and jacked off instead of making an effort to connect with real people. I often use escapist romantic fantasies to help me fall asleep.
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(even while writing this i had to resist the urge to reduce the cringe. i *think* iāve now made it as cringe as i can fit in 280 characters)
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2. For a long time, I didnāt make any real effort to get a gf/bfādespite really wanting oneāin part because I had my own shit to work through, but also because of my own cowardice. COVID has made it harder, but I am trying to meet people and hopefully Iāll find someone special.
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(āactually, i identify as an Alpha Virginā)
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itās not perfect, but i expect that you had different reactions to those two tweets
now for the meta-level: does the fact iām doing this experiment make me higher or lower status in your eyes? now the fact that i asked that question, does it make me higher or lower status? etc.
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Replying to
i have no status feelings about this whatsoever, i think it's valuable to be able to talk about these sorts of things openly and talking about them openly has been really good for me and for others as far as i can tell š