a lot of the common "goals" aren't even really goals they're just a way to fight back against feeling inferior or inadequate "but look mom I did it" style
I never wanted to be a CEO but I'm still sad to give up on it lol
but it made me a lot freer to just be queen of the losers
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This may be a cultural difference cuz I'm mostly in transfem circles and there's a lot of disaster queers but I never actually lost someone to optics/reputation lol
If anything I found that being pretty messy makes people relate more
maybe some honest risk analysis might help
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Honestly one of my favorite things. Before I started transition I had to come to terms with the idea that no one would ever like me/find me attractive again. I had to reconcile inescapably bad optics.
Had to demolish my old self and let go to clear the land for redevelopment.
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little did you know the limitations are mostly self imposed and pretty much everyone likes young adult fem ppl so if you know where to look you can get absolutely swarmed with attention lol
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I never thought I would actually make it fem 😭😭
But yeah, getting attention is very new, and I get overwhelmed and flustered very easily. It's a whole new problem I wasn't expecting, but I guess I'm blessed to have it 😅
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God the fears seem so silly in retrospect
I didn't want to be a man and I had absolutely no interest in being one which bled into isolating for years but I was somehow afraid I'll be _more_ alone after coming out? for a YEAR?
that doesn't even make sense 😂😂
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coming out is actually great practice for letting go for trans people huh
all of that shit you expected to do, all of the things your parents and friends expected you to be like, you're just, "nope"
I wonder if there's something to harness into a ritual useful to cis ppl here
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coming out as a disappointment to my parents
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ow i hurt myself