finally looking at school trauma and jesus fucking christ man
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my entire relationship to the concept of achievement seems to be school-shaped
itās like i always lowkey feel like iām āfailingā but also i donāt wanna do any of my āhomeworkā
fuuuuuuuck thiiiiis
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hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm seems rough
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kinda feel like being a bit of a fuckup while i was still in highschool paid off a bit maybe...
like this shit hits me pretty hard but also i feel like i already dealt with a bunch of it way back then... by disappointing everyone who told me i was supposed to be excelling hmmmm
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i won high school basically lol so this did not happen for me then. 14 AP test 5s, 2400 SATs, got into MIT, intel STS finalist... didnāt really start being a fuckup until grad school and def still havenāt processed that
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