this is a tricky but important thing to talk about so i'd like to clarify, the wording here is slightly off many of us are not sharing with our friends / loved ones how much pain we're actually in because we worry it's so much we would be hurting them; i wanna talk about thishttps://twitter.com/QiaochuYuan/status/1205998281618145280 …
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acceptance also means you don't do the "CBT-ish" (someone have a better word for this?) thing of trying to argue with the feelings - "no you're not a bad person, you're so good!" this pushes the feelings away when you could be holding themhttps://twitter.com/QiaochuYuan/status/1219281482713378818?s=20 …
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you can help people get distance from overwhelming feelings without needing them to be different - "i hear that you feel like a bad person right now" you can just reflect and accept
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ultimately your capacity to accept other people's feelings and pain is bottlenecked by your capacity to accept your own, so if you want to train this skill you can work on that then tell your friends you're not going to be hurt if they tell you about their pain! (if that's true)
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acceptance is the fundamental level 1 skill and if you master it (which is hard) you'll already be much better at emotional support than almost everyone at higher levels you can also learn how to help people name, express, and process their feelings - that's another thread
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but as usual
@DougTataryn's bio-emotive framework is a place i'd highly recommend to start:https://bioemotiveframework.com/Prikaži ovu nit
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