oh, i see. apparently i believe that i'm not allowed to be happy unless i'm perfect. that would explain a lot
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QC Retweeted QC
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QC @QiaochuYuanIt's easier to notice this for "negative" emotions but it's also happening with "positive" emotions. We also don't know how to handle our own joy or wonder or euphoria; we feel we don't deserve it and fear punishment; we fear that we look ridiculous or unacceptable to others.Show this thread1 reply 0 retweets 11 likesShow this thread -
afaict all of my happiest moments over the last 2 years were times when i felt like i was impressing people a lot - that i had been performing perfectly in some sense. it is most reliably the thing i need to access happiness, and the sense that i've done anything wrong kills it
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Replying to @QiaochuYuan
This is huge. What if we're worthy and deserving of love just by existing? I like this story better.
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Replying to @collinofzion
i dunno man sounds like propaganda to me (seriously though, people say this and it has no effect on me, my lived experience is that when i make mistakes people stop loving me, esp. women)
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Replying to @QiaochuYuan @collinofzion
Seems to me like a downside of being in mate-seeking/courtship mode for a significant chunk of adult life :-/.
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no kidding that's why it's wife time
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