QC

The shape of my hope was this: all I have to do is this feelings stuff, and then people will love me. And then I won't feel so alone. And then everything will finally be okay.

https://twitter.com/QiaochuYuan/status/1134955528545755136 …

It took the almost complete dissolution of my most important group of friends for me to begin to understand that hope wasn't the answer any more than fear. That, in fact, there was nothing I could do that would make it all okay.

I have been slowly losing hope over the last year, and I want to be very clear that I think this is progress. I don't know how to do it. I don't know how to do the things I want to do in the world without risking hurting people. I don't know, yet, how to act without hope.

I love you, you're 100% solid, and I do have to say there are many groups of people who have figured out the major pieces of this and are worth connecting to if you feel like you're going insane

thanks man. i have a few connections. the @MonasticAcademy is pretty dope. we’ll see what happens!

Haha, I always end up connecting with these new religion types... :p

would love to hear what groups you’re aware of too, forgot to say that! i’m aware of the circling / authentic relating community (e.g. in austin), and i sort of come from a slice of the rationality / effective altruism community that got really into circling