Dave Keenan

@PunLovinLad

One of the few things Shania Twain is impressed with. Comedy Writer: Credits include Newsjack and Newsrevue. DMs open.

Vrijeme pridruživanja: studeni 2011.

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  1. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    19. ruj 2019.

    My bacon brioche trembles as I pick it out, sweating in its plastic wrapper. Why so anxious, little bun? Death is a tickle, compared to life.

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  2. prije 9 sati

    Overheard 2 girls I work with say 'Shall we go to the new Pret?'. They have to walk by a Pret to get to that Pret 🙄

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  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    3. velj

    Trying to decide what to be anxious about on a Monday

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  4. prije 10 sati

    Stormzy is one of the few lads with a neckbeard who doesn't correct women on what the best Radiohead album

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  5. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    Odgovor korisniku/ci

    Wrong, Dave.

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  6. prije 23 sata

    Ms Trunchbull DEFINITELY voted Brexit

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  7. prije 23 sata

    Watching Matilda on Netflix and why won't everyone leave her to fuck alone :(

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  8. 3. velj

    The Baftas should've been held before Brexit, that way the actors could've had unchlorinated lemon and herb chicken

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  9. 3. velj
    Tweet je nedostupan.
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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Eat the crust on your sandwich what are you a fucking child

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  11. 3. velj

    Keir Starmers privileged background could be disastrous for the Labour party, given that the electorate voted for lifelong chimney sweep Boris Johnson

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  12. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    The app is called “You’re Cancelled.” When you’ve made plans that you wish you could cancel, you go into the app and press a little button. If the other person presses theirs too, congratulations! Confetti exploded and your plans are cancelled.

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    14. sij 2018.

    AXE MURDERER: Can you tell where that family I'm trying to kill is hiding? SHAKIRA'S HIPS: Yes behind that bush over there.

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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    Right: Corbyn meeting with literally anybody his whole career. Wrong: Lisa Nandy meeting with three-times elected former Labour leader

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  15. 2. velj

    Got this lovely newspaper through my letterbox. Apparently Kanye and and the guy who plays Gimli are Christians

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  16. 2. velj

    Saoirse Ronan is the greatest British actress since Brenda Fricker

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj
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  18. 2. velj

    BREXITERS: Brexit gives us a chance to reconnect with our commonwealth INDIANS: Wow! Can't wait to see all my cousins. BREXITERS: No not you lot. Aussies, Kiwis, Canucks - The white ones

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  19. 2. velj
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  20. 2. velj

    You know when Trump does something bizarre and people say SNL couldn't write it. It's more to do with the fact that SNL has been shit for 10 years

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