Understanding something means to model it. Understanding someone means to model how he/she models something. An agent only has agency to the degree that it is able to model itself, and loses agency in the eyes of other agents to the degree that they can out-model it.
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Two gravediggers discover a shared purpose when encountering a decomposing corpse nearby their dwelling place.
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Love is not pretty words and it's most certainly not simply shared purpose. It is not a simple anything. Two ditchdiggers have a shared purpose.
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Most "ditchdiggers" don't actually care about digging ditches, and are just doing it out of desperation. It's not their purpose in life. Real purpose is about engaging in a meaningful, creative, and/or curious passion. Find others who share it, and you will love them.
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