Empathy results from the (usually intrinsic) attention to the subcommunicative mental states of other people. Aspergers is often marked by a lack of intrinsic attention for them (but not for mental states in general).
I think that deep empathy requires to intuitively understand the parts of the mental architecture that create things like group allegiances and signaling in the first place, so it has to go beyond and below that.
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You said most minds "drown in empathy." Most people do not go much further interpretation of signaling or peak states. Rational minds, you say, tend to be non-empathetic. Some. Rational minds can be highly empathetic without feeling a need to develop or act on pity, for example.
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Allistic people can learn to be rational despite their empathetic biases, but it might take them longer. Nerds can learn to become empathetic, but it might take them longer. None of the routes is cut off.
End of conversation
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I know quite a few nerds who are highly empathetic but do not feel that it is helpful in many cases to take action simply because they are able to perceive how someone else feels.
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