clean slate

@PleaseBeGneiss

Earth scientist with some jokes. Oh you're still here. Find my tweets in the link below. Alt is . He/him. K bye.

Vrijeme pridruživanja: veljača 2017.

Tweetovi

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    15. ožu 2018.

    ZOMBIE: *squishing brains through fingers* got your knows

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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    [guy who’s about to invent spaghetti] *looking at snakes* what if they were italian

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  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 2 sata

    her: ugg boots really put Australia on the map me: no it’s always been there

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  4. prije 4 sata

    Noah: *stopping in Australia* let’s leave the scary ones here Noah’s wife: even the kangaroos? Noah: *remembering them eating his parfait* yeah they’re super venomous

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  5. prije 5 sati

    Me: damn hipsters always in trees Zookeeper: those are koalas

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  6. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 6 sati

    Me: I won a trip to Australia! Him: outback? Me: nah, online

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 6 sati

    baby kangaroo: lets play hide & go seek! mom kangaroo: okay! baby kangaroo: *hides in moms pouch* im ready! mom kangaroo: *sighs* are you under the bed

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  8. prije 7 sati

    Me: I’m spiraling Therapist: let’s reverse that Me: how? Therapist: *googling plane tickets* Australia

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 15 sati
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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    What’s your favourite animal? Mine has always been since childhood... the fennec fox... what’s a fennec fox you ask? Well here you go.. you’re welcome to your new favourite animal

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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 21 sat

    Yoda Groot 🤝 🤝 Baby 🤝 🤝 Spice Nut

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  12. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 23 sata

    Cop: do you know why I pulled you over? Me: *peeking out of kangaroo pouch* maybe

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 19 sati
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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 19 sati

    Me: *dies and enters heaven* Steve Irwin: *jumping on an angel and grappling it onto its back* See how his wings are just flapping? That’s a good sign of a healthy temper.

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    Friend: Do you wanna come with me to Australia? Me: Ah sorry, I cant take off work Friend: I’m just nervous because they say everything there is trying to kill you Me: *suddenly holding a packed suitcase* We should get to the airport early

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 19 sati

    All my favorite animals come from Australia: - koalas - kangaroos - russell crowes

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I am a: ⚪️ Man ⚪️ Woman 🔘 Dingo Looking for a: ⚪️ Man ⚪️ Woman 🔘 Baby

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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 21 sat

    [first day as a teacher] Kid: If koalas are marsupials why do we call them bears? Me: Kid: Me: *flicks booger* shut up, Stanley

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  19. prije 21 sat

    Yoda Groot 🤝 🤝 Baby 🤝 🤝 Spice Nut

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  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 22 sata
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  21. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 22 sata
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