And this isn't to say I don't have friends at all. I do and I appreciate all of you. But most of you are online and that only helps so much
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I don't have anyone I can share my love of old computers and consoles with since that requires them to be right next to me
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I don't have anyone I can say "hey I'm having trouble with this one problem can you cone over and help"
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I don't have anyone I can say "hey I need help moving this heavy thing that requires more than one person"
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That's why I still don't have my desk build. I'm literally not strong enough to carry the wood up the stairs
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I'd have asked the local furries back when I was in that group but I couldn't even get a fucking ride to a fur meet so not any real chance
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It wouldn't hurt as much if I hadn't tried as hard as I could to be helpful and nice to the people in that group
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Sure if I needed some directions they'd help but as soon as I needed a ride or help moving something I got no response
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And thats the thing, no response at all. Not even say "sorry, I can't help"
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And thats pretty much been my whole life. I was taught to help everyone I can no matter what. But the world doesn't return the favor
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Experience has taught me to just figure out how to do it on my own
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Because there won't be any help when I need it. No one's going to drop anything for me
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End of conversation
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