"A new visual canvas for Google Assistant" which is making the dream of our fathers—yelling at the television—an interactive reality
-
-
"I didn't tell the Google News app that I follow politics, love to bike, or live in the Bay Area, because Google specializes in comprehensive surveillance"
Show this thread -
We're also excited to announce a whole new way to read news online. We're bringing back Google Reader! [crowd goes nuts] Lol jk
Show this thread -
Full Coverage is a useful news contextualization feature that will algorithmically link breaking stories to Breitbart
Show this thread -
Google attempting to automate journalism with AI would be funny if it wasn't so incredibly damaging.
Show this thread -
-
We're rolling out this complete redesign of news in 127 countries simultaneously because what could go wrong
Show this thread -
Now Android feature: on-device machine learning can learn about how to help you while keeping your data private to every app you've installed on your phone
Show this thread -
Adaptive Brightness is a revolutionary new feature that drops Googlers' IQ by 40 points when thinking about social responsibility
Show this thread -
"Slices" is a new OS feature that seems to cut across privacy boundaries in apps
Show this thread -
"You'll find the new Android UI on any Android device that has software updates." It's like the Willy Wonka golden ticket.
Show this thread -
(My apologies to Googlers exposed to my relentless bullying. Be strong.)
Show this thread -
"Many developers call this concept 'meaningful engagement'". Building a business model on your attention while being sanctimonious about how you spend your time is the most American thing ever
Show this thread -
New gesture called "shush", activated by throwing phone across the room
Show this thread -
Weird Google Maps demo that is also hyper-targeted at, basically, Google employees who live in New York or San Francisco. "Which four star restaurant is trending this week" is not as pressing a topic in Cody, WY.
Show this thread -
The traditional way of discovering new neighborhood businesses "go outside" doesn't have a lot of traction with the kind of people who have Starbucks delivered to their crunch mode startup.
Show this thread -
Google has figured out how to crowdsource data collection for street view by calling it "auto navigation". Simply point the camera at everything around you, dear citizen
Show this thread -
This is like the 40th reference to a sports thing in this demo. Every nerd on stage has made an awkward reference to sportsball
Show this thread -
"If you see an outfit that catches your eye" you can now point your Google Lens phone at it and buy it online. I think the big reveal at the end of this demo is that it was prepared entirely by machine learning, not human beings.
Show this thread -
Now we're on to self-driving cars. My dream for San Francisco is one of high-capacity self-driving cars on dedicated rights of way
Show this thread -
LOL, to talk about car safety they are bringing out a guy named... Dmitri. I am a proud Slav, but this is not the topic you want one of us presenting on
Show this thread -
Integrated DNA testing in the wheel well allows us not only to detect pedestrians, but to automatically notify next-of-kin
Show this thread -
-
If you enjoyed this thread, please help support ten Congressional candidates who will hopefully tax and regulate Google into a smoking crater once they're in office. I'll live-tweet that too!https://secure.actblue.com/donate/great_slate …
Show this thread
End of conversation
New conversation -
Loading seems to be taking a while.
Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.
