Axl Rose is playing on the P.A., asking the tough questions. Where do we go now, indeed? Now an incongruous R.E.M. with "losing my religion"pic.twitter.com/GmqzcLek9n
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Junior is tearing in to Hunter Biden, complaining about his hard life as a Republican scion. Someone from the crowd passes him a Where's Hunter shirt. Now making Biden senility jokes
Now we're moving to Elizabeth Warren. Crowd can't wait. This event is pretty packed, by the way. Only empty seats are the ones directly blocked by media island. Thousands of people
The media is "the marketing wing of the other side" and ignores facts, says Don Jr., talking about mainstream media the way we talk about Fox
For the second time, the crowd chants "lock her up!" at a mention of Nancy Pelosi. I thought I misheard the first time
Pence is introduced, a much weaker speaker than Don Jr. He has no idea how to egg on this crowd, which is here to have fun. He's all church and rotary club energypic.twitter.com/jn8G8e3UnX
Pence reminds the crowd that "the President stands without apology for the sanctity of hunan life" which is hard to swallow but definitely a pillar of Trump's support
Pence boasts about what are legitimately stellar employment numbers since Trump took office. Also claims rising blue collar wages, to great applause. But drain the swamp gets biggest cheers
Gotta say I'm digging all the booing for socialism at this event. Sorry not sorry 
Pence is definitely the Yoko track on a Lennon album. He can't even hold this audience, the largest and most sympathetic he'll see in his career
Now Sweet Child of Mine blasts and a pit crew runs out to reconfigure the podium, adding teleprompter and presidential seal
Trump walks out, taking his time, to "god bless the USA". He looks a little–dare I say it?–low energy
Trump opens bragging about crowd size, claiming (probably correctly) he has more than the democratic candidates put together. He lies about never having empty seats in front of a crowd that can see it's not true
More chants of LOCK HER UP when Trump talks about hearing angry mumbling behind him during the State of the Union
Trump's goal is not to win re-election, he says. He sees it as a given. He wants to take back the House of Representatives. Gives shout out to "warrior Senator" Lindsey Graham
Huge cheers to Google financed representatives Kevin McCarthy and Steve Scalise, reprising his bizarre comedy routine about Scalise getting shot
Another recipient of Google donations, homophobe Tom Emmer, gets called out for applause
Don Jr. and the "very beautiful even though I'm not allowed to say that because she's my daughter" Ivanka called to stage. First time I've seen an Internet Freedom Award winner
Trump again stressing how good his job numbers are for African Americans, in particular youth. Calls Republican Party the party of equal opportunity
Now attacking wind energy, extremely popular among republicans in Iowa. "Want to see a graveyard for birds? Go look under a windmill"
"The virus–rough stuff! President Xi is doing an excellent job. It will work itself out." Ties drug problem in New Hampshire to illegal immigrants. It's true I really wish I had drugs right now
Trump boasts that the Democrats will give him anything except the wall. This is true–the Democratic House voted through a huge military bill mid-impeachment
Trump on his bit about two timeless technologies–"a wheel and a wall". He reads the lyrics to a song called "The Snake" about a woman who takes in a refugee serpent and is bitten for her trouble
Surprisingly, a bunch of people are leaving early. Maybe to beat traffic, maybe because they just wanted to see Trump
"The Democratic Party wants to run your health care, when they can't even run an election in Iowa." Says they're trying to take it away from Bernie again. "They're doing it to you again, Bernie!"
Trump muses about how the swamp was far dirtier and deeper than he ever dreamed. That's why it will take four more years to clean it out. Crowd seems pro-swamp-drainage
Trump is funny in a way the cameras at these rallies don't capture well. He's also not senile. The hair situation remains unclear
And with that, the rally is over. Trump played the hits! The only rival candidates name checked were Biden, Pelosi, Bernie and Warren. People seemed to have fun. I called for Death to take me, but Death would not come
We can win narrowly in November with many candidates. But to carry the Senate, we'll need to elect people who can reach the kind of person who would come to this rally. It's not going to be easy
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