There will be a 0 km race before the parade. Trump gets a head start.
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Trump IS A Hero! He fought & defeated Hillary

















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And Trump would make Mexico pay for the Vietnam War.
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#IfOnlyTrumpHadBeenThere dinosaurs wouldn't have gone extinct. He would have used his tiny hands to bat away the asteroid.Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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Spot-on, but I imagine Borowitz's growing challenge is how best to do a parody of a parody.
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People called him a coward for not going down there and when he did you said he forced people to give him a parade
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“Faster than a speeding bullet, more loco than a locomotive” It’s super Trump
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3 seconds of hope that it was a parody. Every time.
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The same NRA that will not allow their paid politician to ban plastic toy guns are now wanting to improve background check, the political climate is changing and they know that...https://twitter.com/DJBurn77/status/966459474109018112 …
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As opposed to the awesome bravery shown by the first 4 officers at the scene who let the kids bleed for 4 minutes ?
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Love it!
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Years from now people will be comparing Borowitz with actual stories of events during this crime scene.
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This is just obscene!
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He's gonna award himself the Presidential Medal of Freedom, isn't he?
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Oops, typo in your copy. It's
@BorowitzReport .Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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And the hypothetical crowd goes wild!
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Good stuff. Reminds me of Obama's Nobel peace prize in 2009
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President look racy in hypothetical act in school of good heroism, please.
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