Hello room service? My wife is disappointed with the wine selections
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Did you get the divorce papers? Yes... I did.
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Yes, I’d like to make a reformation...I mean a reservation.
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New Yorker cartoons are trash
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Someone’s feisty tonight.
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No I hate them every night
End of conversation
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Is this a haunted room! Feel like somebody is scribbling on my back, with a knife! Can’t pee on my pants. Only pair I got!
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I got a very serious text today.
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"What... seriously... rate my pain? Well, it's 10 yrs of marriage and 2 inches of OoouCH!"
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Et tu Comcast
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"Yes Don, I've received your letter".
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"Well, honey, I've been served."
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I don't know. She said something about it being her Emancipation Proclamation.
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Hello I’d like to retract my vote
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Is his Eminence the Pontiff available? I have message from Martin Luther ...
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"I want to report a Reformation"
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