The Hell with no talking! Christ, my imaginary friend would be so hurt.

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Should we use a stop watch to time our eye contact? What is the best eye contact stop watch? Do you have a coupon?
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Do not suddenly open your eyes really wide and say "I have to find another human body".
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i break this all the time on purpose people want to talk
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Why? Why can't I say good morning? Why can't I say "nice tie, nice shoes. Let's acknowledge each bothered existence for 20 seconds!
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Good advice for NY City, where most people are some form of mentally disturbed
In SoCal we just share sun block and joints...
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Good thing you didn't say don't scream in an elevator... I wouldn't have met my husband of 31 years and our 4 kids wouldn't have been born
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Facing the back in a crowded elevator is always popular, especially if your face starts twitching.
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How am I supposed to promote my fruits and veggies without an elevator speech?!
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As when you are surrounded by wolves?
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*frantically presses 'close doors' to prevent anyone from entering*https://twitter.com/newyorker/status/859535622373027840 …
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Is the limit one fart, or two?
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Fuck that. I stare directly at you until one of us leaves. I take no chances.
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YES!! Thank you!!!!
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