H. Poteat

@NSQE

Privacy Superhero . Working on woke. Still trying to save the world. Queer. Dorky. Not endorsing you. Building landing strips for gay Martians.

My name is not Heather.
Vrijeme pridruživanja: kolovoz 2009.

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet
    16. ožu 2015.

    My name is not Heather. My name is never going to be Heather. My name doesn't even sound like Heather. It's a nice name, but it's not mine.

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  2. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    prije 9 sati
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  3. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I just heard the news that Rush Limbaugh has advanced lung cancer. I’m going to show you how this should be done: I wish Rush a speedy and complete recovery from his cancer. Human being pro-tip: don’t wish cancer on *anyone*...even on your adversaries.

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  4. 4. velj

    YESSSSSS. Futuristic Violence And Fancy Suits was one of my favorite books of the last few years, and I've been eagerly awaiting the sequel. Of course, the sequel is appropriately titled. I cannot wait. Bring it to meeeeeee.

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  5. 3. velj

    If you're ever dealing with imposter syndrome or otherwise worrying that you're not good enough or don't belong, just remember that a group of marketing professionals paid an advertising professional a large amount of money to come up with "BabyNut."

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  6. 3. velj

    Welp. That’s the end of that superbowl. Good try, Niners, see you in another decade.

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  7. 3. velj

    It’s almost as if Jennifer Lopez has been putting on a massive Vegas residency for five years.

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  8. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    whatever Jeep paid Bill Murray for this, it was worth it

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    2. velj

    Yeah, we get it. You’re a nerd. A superior human being. If anyone dares to make fun of your obsession with Raspberry Pi or the extended Star Wars universe or anime or gaming, that’s mean, but it’s okay to hate on sportsball because someone was mean to you in gym class.

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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I was today years old when I learned that an ampersand (&) is a ligature for the word 'et'

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  11. 2. velj

    Just want you to all know I'm gonna spend my vacation going through Twitter and liking random posts with "fuck" and "vodka" in them. I hope someday somebody asks to comb through the internet and find them so they can judge me for it.

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  12. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    every time an exec asks "who has the D?" the world around me fades to black while I struggle to keep my laughter inside my head. please don't use this phrase

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  13. 1. velj

    Should I be worried? 😒

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  14. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    As I watch some people jump to increasingly bleak conclusions about the fate of our republic in light of the Senate voting down witnesses, I'm thinking today about the Stockdale Paradox.

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    FIFY: "...to get you all ready for the Super Bowl." We can all say "Super Bowl." SUPER BOWL. SUPER BOWL. SUPER BOWL.

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    31. sij

    NEW: from me and the indomitable , whose incredible reporting on the wireless location data scandal has almost single handedly forced the U.S. government to actually do its job:

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  17. 31. sij

    No YOU'RE sniffling on the couch in sweatpants watching the end of

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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    30. sij

    All the time, but it’s a tactic used by people who feel insecure about themselves. So go ahead, you’re communicating a lot more about yourself than me.

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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet
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  20. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    I DO MY HAIR TOSS 💁🏽‍♀️ CHECK MY NAILS 💅🏽 BABY HOW YOU FEELIN’? 🤔 FEELIN ᵒᵛᵉʳʷʰᵉˡᵐᵉᵈ

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  21. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    30. sij

    okay, i hate to be That Person On Twitter, but I just had the WORST experience with tech support so not only did they make me wait 20 minutes but when the operator got on she IMMEDIATELY said the code phrase that restored all my memories of my time as The Company's top assassin

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