contributing writer @wearemel, @ringer, & @splicetoday. seen in @theatlantic, @parisreview, &c. repped by @inkwellmgmt. co-host of @whatisleftpod 
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As much as I support the open and proud use of anabolics, I love when you folks keep it kayfabe. Attribute your outer strength to Jesus, the Democratic Party, critical theory, being a role model, hard work (lol patreon subscriptions), podcasts, "coaching" (steroid dealer), etc.
Tell me you hit a growth spurt. Tell me it was late life puberty. Say you cleaned up your diet. Say you started drinking that fish oil or snorting that kratom. Anything. Tell me all of it. I'm here for it. I love to see it. I love spilling tea but I adore kayfabe bullshittery
Ok but nobody in those circles has ever credited the Democratic Party lol
I hope someone does because that Peter Dauou (sic) Nutrition (TM) endorsement is gonna be big league. Hit that PR in a pink pussy hat, Howard Dean zubaz pants, and a netroots nation t shirt
253 to 336 bench and a 20 lb BW weight increase in 6 months. The power of prayer. (And that DL!)pic.twitter.com/FIL5wtGx13
Seems like somebody hit a "growth spurt"
It’s all about genetics bruh
Critical theory is a new one for me
That's a euphemism for something much lamer they're doing
A classic “oh I’ve been eating my Wheaties” usually does the trick
Also fun for high school reunions “Hey thanks yeah I just finished a four year prison sentence.”
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