contributing writer @wearemel, @ringer, & @splicetoday. seen in @theatlantic, @parisreview, &c. repped by @inkwellmgmt. co-host of @whatisleftpod 
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kids, i'm here to a lay a take on you. i will always support steroid use by my favorite fitness influencers. i will promote it. i want them to use the most steroids. i want them to use all the steroids. i want them so big you'll hear them coming long before you see them
my take on this is the same as it was in high school/college regarding blackout drinking. i loved to see it. i loved to see people just getting obliterated night after night. i was there for it, cold sober the whole time and enjoying every minute of it. that's tea, sis
my dad used to have a couple illiterate employees working for him and he was never prouder of anything in his life. he'd trot these two dudes out and brag about how they couldn't spell a word or add numbers despite having no developmental difficulties. he loved to see it
"I’ve partaken of much, but nothing works on me. I haven’t really laughed properly, even once, and I’ve never thrown up, even once. I, who have partaken of so much in this world that I’ve lost count and the sequence of it all, I am soberer than anyone else in this world."
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