contributing writer @wearemel, @ringer, & @splicetoday. seen in @theatlantic, @parisreview, &c. repped by @inkwellmgmt. co-host of @whatisleftpod 
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Many of you are waiting for me to endorse a presidential candidate, but I will have to disappoint you. I cover Bodybuilding and Wrestling, and for the sake of this Beat and my Journalistic Objectivity, I must remain impartial. I cannot afford to alienate the Fans
I do not want the Fans to think that my Hard Hitting Coverage of “Bodybuilder Crotch Bulges” or “the History of Anal Tampons in Wrestling” or “Hemorrhoids in 2019” has been unduly influenced by my stanning for candidates like @AndrewYang , @BeyondTheCenter , or @JesseVenturaFP
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