Lengthy (and mostly fictional) inspirational captions written by Instagram influencers might be the most mawkish and barf-inducing content yet seen on this planet
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I don't care how you overcame your fear of your slightly oversized front teeth if the end result is that this has given you the courage to sell me unisex cotton/poly/spandex boxer briefs. I wish you'd stayed fearful
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People with nigh-perfect bodies opining about how they came to terms with imperfect bodily features like their 9/10 posterior or 8.8/10 calves or claiming to represent "body positivity at any size" while being juiced to high heaven on some cocktail of performance enhancers
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These grifters understand that late stage capitalism requires a tale of "overcoming oppression" in order to trick rubes and marks into paying more for inferior products, but their narratives are often so pathetic, forced, corny, and trifling
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I know some of these scoundrels, and believe me, they talk like chain smoking 1960s used car salesmen behind closed doors
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The end result of this, and what really angers me here, is that their commodified phony oppression further marginalizes the voiceless multitudes who suffer in silence while these flimflam artists are out there selling insincerity in Dolby Digital Surround Sound
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