Jesus, people, it's like I've come down to the planet of the apes and I've got to explain pizza to you. <takes breath> Allright.
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Replying to @MorlockP
Pizza comes in only one variety: thin crust New York style. There are other pizza-like things out there, but they are not pizza.
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Replying to @MorlockP
It is thin, the underside is a mix of yellow, maple syrup brown, and slight spots of charing. Semolina flour stuck to bottom is a good sign.
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Replying to @MorlockP
If it's not made in a brick or coal oven, it's made in a gas fired, beaten up 25 year old stainless steel pizza oven.
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Replying to @MorlockP
It is made by a thin guy and his fat wife, or - alternately - a fat guy and his thin wife. At least one of them born in the Old Country.
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Replying to @MorlockP
It is made in a shop that has been there for at least 15 years. Either there are just five or six toppings available, or there are more, but
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you are looked at askance if you order anything on your pizza that your italian grandmother wouldn't put on a plate and cover w marinara
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