2/ None of the "update this browser" , "update the OS" etc pathways work. Each reaches out to some server which is either no longer powered up, no longer hosting updates from version Dinosaur-0.3 to Dinosaur-0.4, or otherwise unwilling to accept the request.
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3/ A wipe of the machine down to bare metal and an install from scratch of the latest Ubuntu seems like the only non-suicidal path forward ... but having JUST gotten the CNC machine 100% running, I don't want to destroy the one one PC with correctly configured software.
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4/ ...so I may just throw dollars at this problem, and buy a new bottom-tier PC so I can build it up and verify that it works just as well as the old PC. ...at which point, I might just toss the old PC in the dumpster (literally).
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