I've got a big rant that it's inherently impossible. Lots of preppers want to buy such a thing, And lots of folks want to sell such a thing (can of survival seeds, field of Jerusalem artichokes), but what's really necessary is practice, skill, local knowledge. https://twitter.com/gaitanalyst/status/1197672195264266240 …
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5/ Step back. Think about what gardening and farming is. The ecosystem is a ruthlessly competitive Darwinian endeavor where the organisms that reproduce fast and fend off predators survive. Every plan that exists survives in that environment. Storing huge piles of calories >
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6/ in convenient, ready-to-pluck form is a waste of energy that could be better spent reproducing, growing thorns and poisons to keep predators away, etc. Those things that thrive? They're what we call weeds. Also, trees. Few or zero calories.
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7/ The things that humans call food are things that we willed into existence by (a) selective breeding, (b) ...for unnatural environments. Let me explain:
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8/ Potatoes or corn or whatever waste their energy storing calories. There's no way they can survive in the natural Darwinian state. Mankind didn't just create these species, we created environments they live in * artificial irrigation * artificial lack of competition (weeding)
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9/ The environment is crucial. Corn beats out weeds only in the environment known as "a farm run by a human". In EVERY OTHER ENVIRONMENT, weeds beat out corn. So farming and gardening is really "the science of creating artificial environments".
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10/ <puts fedora on> ok, that sounds easy enough ! I just get a 50 lb sack of "artificial environment" and sprinkle it over the soil, right? No. Environment has a dozen dimensions: * sunlight * water * seed planting depth * fertilizer type * fertilizer schedule * weeding >>>
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11/ Yeah, but still ... we could make a big box that has tubes coming out of it, and the tubs carry water and food and weedkiller to the crops, and ... well, OK, people try this. In the limit (zero soil), it's aquaponics ... and it requires a TON of equipment per calorie out.
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12/ If you're still planting in dirt, then it's called "fertigation" ( fertilizer + irrigation). But how much fertilizer? How much irrigation? Depends. Also, the right solution isn't static. You have to have a human in the loop, inspecting plants every day or two.
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13/ Are the plants a bit yellow? Too much water. A bit brown? Too little. White mold on the leaves? Gray mold? Rust colored specs? Small orange and black beetles? Failing to thrive? Holes in leaves? There's an encyclopedia of knowledge FOR EACH CROP SPECIES.
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14/ When do you harvest it? How do you harvest it? How do you store it? oops, skipped a step! Often you have to "harden off" before storage. Ignore that and your crop rots in the basement. How long does the stored crop last? How do you save seeds for replanting?
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15/ And every single detail in the thread above differs in Maine vs Ohio vs TN vs TX.
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16/ So, anyway, to restate my thesis: * yes, you need tools to garden. One could imagine a starter set of spade, shovel, irrigation tube, weed barrier, trowel, dibbing stick, etc. And have 54 variants for zones 1-6 times crops A-I. * ...but you need so much knowledge too.
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17/ So it's sort of like asking "I want to paint portraits of people, but also still lifes of apples - which two 'how to paint' kits should I buy? Why does no one sell these?"
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18/ Studying how to forage dandelion leaves and how to process acorns to make them edible, and all the rest is a fun hobby, but, yes, we're agreed that if SHTF, it's a non starter. I suspect even an expert would be hard pressed to find 500 cal/day https://twitter.com/rich_marie/status/1197887675455307779 …
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19/ Very cool! Yes, I certainly think this is doable - I mean, we have an existence proof in recent times from American natives, etc. (a) I'm super impressed (b) off on a tangent from original question re "garden in a box" kits. https://twitter.com/rich_marie/status/1197888743543164931 …
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20/ I've been hobby farming for almost 6 years now, and despite: * 6 years of practice * dozens of books read * somewhere between $10,000 and $100k on equipment, depending on how you count my results are still inconsistent
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21/ $20k low end = tractor + 1 or 2 implements, plus a bunch of shovels & random crap high end includes that plus a greenhouse, raised beds, underground water to the green house, butcher equipment, a new subpanel + chest freezers, labor, fencing, irrigation, weed barrier, gates
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22/ (a) I bet half by volume, not by calories. A dozen tomatoes look great on the table, but ... (b) I suspect your parents had years of experience dialing the whole process in, no?https://twitter.com/ctdonath/status/1197891741229162496 …
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23/ ok, then this sounds like it's perfectly compatible with my view of things, yes? or am I missing something?https://twitter.com/ctdonath/status/1197892946781188096 …
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24/ I strongly agree with this. There are only two "how to farm after SHTF" models: (a) don't; have a huge amount of cheap food stored (b) already have 10 years +/- of experience farming for 50% + of your calories.https://twitter.com/simplic10/status/1197927933798518784 …
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25/ ...and even for folks who farm before SHTF, you probably want a ton of stored food. Farm is hard in the best of times ...when you can buy diesel 1 mile down the road for $2.50/gallon...and can get pig feed delivered for $13/50 lbs sack (10% off if you order 1+ tons).
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26/ I can't remotely imagine what I'd do in a "six nines" disaster. Electric gone, diesel gone, no truck loads of pig feed? Whew lads! Probably die, like everyone else.
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27/ Depends - do you want to prepare for WW III ? Or just take up gardening as a hobby? If WW III: build a small cabin with a wood stove, and a basement full of cheap survival carbs.https://twitter.com/Isegoria/status/1197931777005957120 …
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28/ If hobby gardening - plant a few fruit trees, maybe a raised bed, maybe a chicken coop with some automatic feeder and waterer that you refill on weekends.
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29/ AKSHUALLY, I think the preppers tend to believe more in "magic seeds". Almost a fairy tale, if you think about it...https://twitter.com/shadowcat_mst/status/1197936979134033921 …
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30/ Wife saw some prepper video (or magazine article? IDK) once where the guy was saying that THINGS can be TAKEN FROM YOU, maaaaan ... so what you REALLY want is knowledge. Because if you have that, others will band together with you. She told me this and we both laughed. >>
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31/ Cause I'm picturing guys like my farmhands. Remember the one who told me I should plant corn seeds 4 feet underground like the Hopi indians? That guy had no equipment, but he SURE HAD A LOT OF KNOWLEDGE !!!1!
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32/ So picture the scenario: day minus 1 : tensions w China increase day 0: news is talking about EMP bombs - then the power goes out day 1-3: you cooperate w neighbors, arrange patrols, lock all your doors day 4: three hippies from Cambridge show up with bug out bags >>>
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33/ "hey, maan ... we're here to share our knowledge with you. We don't have food or tools, we've never practiced gardening, we have no fuel. But that's OK, maaaaan...YOU'VE GOT THOSE THINGS! So let's, like, form a mutual aid survivor camp and we'll tell you what to do!"
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