But! The other young couples were amazing, by which I mean not, and really taught us a lot, by which I mean by negative example. They spent the entire session trying, like the future lawyers they weren't, to find loopholes to use contraception whenever they wanted.
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It was the first time I'd really seen myself from the outside on this issue. It wasn't a good look for them, or for me.
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Later, my wife's uncle was to perform the wedding Mass, and so he told me one of the conditions of marriage in the Catholic Church was being open to whatever children with whom God blessed the marriage. I managed not to gulp as the impact of that hit all at once.
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In a sense, looking back, I've had three great epochs of Catholic formation: When I insisted on studying more before Confirmation; that time period from about October before my wedding through the wedding Mass; and more slowly but certainly, since.
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Part of being a good Catholic is understanding that sometimes the rules simply are. They may be inconvenient, they may hurt, but they serve a greater Good, so suck it up, Buttercup.
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Anyone who blathers at you about the extraordinary efficacy of NFP, in whatever updated form they use now, is (1) lying (2) delusional (3) self-brainwashed (4) naive (5) blessed with (or his wife blessed with) the most perfectly regular cycle ever.
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We do not have this many kids because True NFP Was Never Tried. There are REAMS of graph paper marking all sorts of things I never thought ye gods anyone would ever graph except in a hospital.
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The closest we've managed to near-efficacy is a nearly-six year period during which we had one kid, managed to go nearly three years without another, then managed even closer to three years without yet another. We are now back to every 20-22 months.
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I'm going to tell you something else it took me years to understand. Not to know; to understand. Humans are in love with control, even over things we maybe shouldn't control, and honestly can't control. As with many things, in small doses, it's good. In some contexts, it's bad.
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All of the NFP propaganda, for Catholics anyway, is an attempt to encourage people trained since early childhood to love control to think they can exercise control in a licit way. You can't. You're quite literally doomed. Embrace it.
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"doomed" <sigh> Wish I had 5 or 10 kids myself. :-/
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