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  1. 3. velj

    Spongebob finally had his moment in a Super Bowl halftime show

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  2. 1. velj

    What is the point of hair in the ass crack? The asshole doesn’t need it for warmth. It’s just an inconvenience at best and a spiderweb that catches shit at worst

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  3. 30. sij

    Why the fuck do they still send advertisements in the mail? Who in this day and age receives shit paper ads and says "just what I needed" Old people can't even use half the garbage because it requires them to go online

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  4. 29. sij

    Been thinking about Wumpus from Discord. I hope he's doing well. I'm always worried Springle and the other high elves bully him

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  5. 27. sij

    Holy shit, this is huge. Welcome back, Killer Bean

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  6. 25. sij

    While you were out partying, I was gaining reddit karma While you were studying for school, I was studying martial arts You are beneath me Mom said I had to dress nice today. She can’t control me. No one can

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  7. 25. sij

    Onision in court looking like a middle schooler in debate club about to argue the ethics of chewing gum in class

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  8. 23. sij

    Wow you’re hot 😳 Might just think of you next time I pee Geez

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  9. 22. sij

    I keep having nightmares about getting a haircut

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  10. 20. sij

    How can someone be this unlikeable? Watching my grandpa get hit by a car would be less painful than watching her speech here

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  11. 20. sij

    Finally an app that aims to make stalker’s lives a bit easier. It should also come in handy for human trafficking. Amazing

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  12. 19. sij

    The biggest pussies on Twitter are the turbo virgins that lock down their account after getting called out on their dumb shit

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  13. 18. sij

    I think it's time we be more considerate to the humor challenged people of Twitter. These people can't recognize a joke so please show some compassion and mark all comedic posts with something like "the following is intended as a joke"

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  14. 16. sij

    The thing I respect most about meth addicts is how fast they can run while naked. My balls flop around way too much. If I ran nude, my scrotum would look like a tangled Xbox controller wire

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  15. 16. sij

    Fuck I just found out a friend of mine likes something I don’t like. My day is ruined and I don’t know how I’m ever going to look at them again

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  16. 15. sij

    Saw a man on a motorcycle wheelie through a red light like something out of a Godsmack music video. That guy is playing life on hardcore mode

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  17. 14. sij

    I hope Smash Ultimate gets ridiculous with its new characters like in a year the top tier characters are George Lucas, Little Foot, and Jeffrey Epstein’s corpse

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  18. 13. sij

    I always root for the dudes that leave comments on pornstar posts saying shit like wonderful vaginal elasticity, this may truly be your magnum opus. Though I must say, the man didn't seem to appreciate you as much as I would have. My dms are open and I do pray you'll reach out

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  19. 12. sij

    Been thinking about getting a tattoo on my asshole, not because I think it'll look cool, but I like the idea of a video game hidden easter egg in real life. Might tattoo an amazon code on the old chocolate star fish so whoever finds it gets a prize

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  20. 11. sij

    Been trying to order one of these for days. I’ve got to know what Gwyneth Paltrow’s vagina smells like

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