"My life needs 43% more dog." "That's an awfully specific figure." "I know what I need; it's 43% more dog." "Does that mean you have 7 dogs and you need 3 more or..." "Why are you so hung up on this?" "I just need to know if you're very good at mental math or very bad at dogs."
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I'm already devising experimental protocols to test that thesis.
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I know you're kidding, but I feel like legally have to tell you not to, or I'll end up in Dog Court.
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*THOUGHT* EXPERIMENTS *THOUGHT* EXPERIMENTS . ..wait wat there's a fucking *dog court* now? Holy hellfire, the country really is going to the dogs. I thought that was an idiom.
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OH NO! I'VE SAID TOO MUCH. I CAN HEAR THE SCRATCHING AT THE DOOR.
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Just give them some treats! And maybe a few steaks, topped with liver.
End of conversation
New conversation -
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FIFTY-SEVEN%! Does dog even have all of its vital organs? Reader is concerned, not judging! Is dog on life support? Do we need to start a Dog Go-Fund-Me? o_o
Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. UndoUndo
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