For those trying to better themselves in the new year—a lot of resolutions begin from the feeling of being tired of past failure or fed up with weaknesses. We often have to start here, but trying to use all your self-hatred to spite yourself into self-improvement doesn't work.
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Rejecting negative qualities in yourself and other people and talking about how pissed off you are with your own weakness is not the same thing as strength. It's the equivalent of trying to hate yourself into loving yourself enough to care and change.
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I've justified such self-deprecation by saying that it's honest, or that I have to feel terrible and hit rock-bottom to really improve. This leads to more of a victim complex than anything else.
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You don't have to define yourself as a terrible person in order to be deserving of more self-improvement. All the contrition and apologizing in the world isn't the same as treating yourself and others well and finding worth in your attempts to be a better person.
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I'm writing this mostly to remind myself after a difficult year, but I also hope that it helps you if you needed to hear this. And if you have new year's resolutions, I'm rooting for you!
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