Merry KishVarmennettu tili

Same. It took me years to realize that "trying to win over affection" is not in any way a romantic gesture. When it did finally sink it, I not only found it easier to talk to women, but I felt better about myself too.

I had that drilled in my head as well. It was amplified by the teaching that if you were a "nice guy", any woman should want you if you kept on them. That rom com bullshit. Really poisonous stuff that I talk to other men and kids about now

Raising a son (and a daughter) this is super important for me to teach. My husband is right here teaching it too.

I'm often told that I'm flirting with women when I'm absolutely not trying to. Took a while to realise that what people took as flirting was "treating women with the respect and courtesy any man would expect".

I really wish this was taught to me by my parents, but I understand that it was something they had to learn on their own as well. But now that we're where we're at, we can keep learning, and teach others to do the same. Thanks for sharing.

Been thinking about this too in recent days. How media’s notion of romance and courting women is often really toxic and harmful. Just persist, if you’re the “one” she will come around eventually, you might have to trick her once or twice though... and kids snap these things up.