I know firsthand, from meeting my father’s surgeon, that when you’re in a life-or-death situation, the trappings of authority are *very* psychologically compelling and it’s hard to ask tough questions of the guy in the white coat. “This is standard.” “Oh ok.”
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And there’s the usual bias (not just by doctors but by the rest of us) towards believing medical treatment can do more than it can. The narrative is “when you’re sick, a doctor can make you well.” We want to be fussed over and fixed; we’re disappointed by “go home and rest.”
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When a TV show like House MD wants to show that a doctor is a brave maverick, they show him breaking the rules to give patients risky treatments — never breaking the rules to leave patients alone.
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It takes effort to give fair consideration to “what if this *doesn’t* work? How does this procedure or drug compare to *doing nothing*?” When the evidence is ambiguous, err on the side of LESS treatment.
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I sometimes fantasize that to really fix this problem we’d need more opportunities to get caring personal attention *with no* drugs or surgeries.
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Like, if someone is sick with something there’s no effective treatment for, they should still get to rest up in a special healing environment and temporarily have other people take care of their needs.
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I loved giving birth in a hospital — because there were nice nurses around who encouraged me & helped me to the potty when I was too weak to stand. I fucking *loved* having the friendly company and the reassuring structure of a familiar (medical) culture.
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But you know what? It cost me thousands of dollars, even with health insurance. And I had a perfectly healthy birth that didn’t need much medical intervention. Why am I paying thousands of dollars for, mostly, *company*?
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(Yeah, it’s a bit less risky to have a hospital birth than a home birth, and it makes a big difference in an emergency. But in most cases, you’re fine either way.)
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Doctors and nurses should not be the only professional be-nice-to-you-when-you’re-sick-ers. Medical hospitals should not be the only place you can go when you need caretaking.
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I have friends who are doulas. They have feels about lack of awareness of the option
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Replying to @Meaningness
I knew about doulas! I just expected them to be...y'know, touchy-feely. The kind of person who makes you *more* stressed to be around because you have to perform "being emotionally stable" for them otherwise they'll slather you in therapist-speak.
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Replying to @s_r_constantin @Meaningness
What I need while giving birth is someone who *acts like a nurse.* She's seen it all before, she isn't worried, she's happy for me getting to have a baby, she has lots of facts at her disposal, and she won't act weird if I scream or grossed out by bodily fluids.
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