They've put me by the door of this restaurant like a Madame at a cheap brothel. I asked for the burger well-done. Hanon on the tabletop.
Perhaps beguile the wait by recalling your favorite Wodehovian delights? The Startled Shrimp? Dull thud versus Sickening thud?
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Parrot dragged through a hedge backwards? London late at night is no place for a man in scarlet tights? So many to choose from.
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And all of them brilliant, too. Pick one, or two, or a dozen. Remember, the man who is tired of Wodehouse is tired of life.
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