When it first really sank in that I would die, I started crying. My mom consoled me, saying it would be just like going to sleep. Mostly I don't fear death too much. Since age 40 my finite time span is always on my mind. But I just try to do lots of good stuff. (1/n)
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When my wife had some medical problems a few years ago, I started worrying about "managing the decline" - losing our good health, losing our mental acuity. That will clearly be the biggest challenge to come... sometimes terrifying. But that's different than death. (2/n)
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Sometimes when I'm on an airplane and it plunges a bit due to turbulence, I get really scared. My body floods with adrenaline and I start sweating. This is some sort of animal reaction to a threat. It seems different from the metaphysical fear of no longer existing. (3/n)
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Some say death is not so bad - the unpleasant part is *dying*. Woody Allen replied, "I wouldn't mind dying so much if it wasn't that I would be dead at the end of it." (4/n)
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Last year I had a bout of trying to imagine being dead. Silly, I know! But it's too easy to imagine the future continuing as if one were floating above the world, watching it. For each of us, though, it's different: a bit of life, and then nothing. Time ends. (5/n)
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I had a colonoscopy recently - I just got the test results and they're fine. The interesting thing was the anesthesia. I was lying in the operating room, they called out for me to verify my name and give consent, and then (6/n)
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Perhaps worth pointing out that most colonoscopies are performed not under anesthesia but rather under sedation. The usual practice is to combine two drugs, one to suppress conscious awareness, and one to prevent the formation of memories. The latter drug forestalls complaints.
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