“MUMMY I will not stop shouting an I will NOT say sorry datcos I am NOT sorry and YOU aren’t my best friend anymore and you won’t get ANY treats datcos you’re a VERY naughty boy” Child is seething. My crime? Conditioning her hair.
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I haven’t a clue about curls. It’s a whole new ball game. A kind soul on Twitter told me about the conditioner in towel dried hair trick and it’s really the only thing that keeps her from looking like she’s being raised by wolves.
I’m not imposing my preferences on her. It’s curly and it gets tuggy and that hurts her. Conditioner helps that.
Try the curly girl thing. No shampoo. "wash" with conditioner. Rinse. More conditioner on super wet hair drop curls onto long sleeve t shirt and tie up with sleeves around head (the loops on towels fuzz up curls, t shirt jersey nice and smooth 
)