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  1. Prikvačeni tweet

    Please...my son. He's very sick.

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  2. Tag yourself and your friends. It's dope. I'm obviously FartinFrankie. Because of all the farting.

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  3. Went to bad at 2 am Up at 5 am Do I go back to sleep or play Sims 4 for the very first time?

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  4. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    6. velj

    This is a photo of my great-great-great grandmother when she was my age. This probably won’t get a lot of retweets but I think she looks gorgeous.

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  5. I’m not sure if a book can "slap" - or if I'm too old to even say the word - but I'm 2/3 through The Punch Escrow and it's slaptastic.

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  6. Y'all wash your bananas with warm water or cold after you peel them?

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  7. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    27. velj 2014.

    Hey pal, you wanna take this outside? *me & the guy from the bar scoop the bug up on a napkin and set it down gently on the grass in front*

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  8. It's that's time of year when my favorite stupid fish pops up again.

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  9. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. velj

    While working on BL3 I accidentally knocked over a folding spice rack. The sound of the jars sort of reminded me of grenades. I put that spice rack through its paces to record and design the reload parts for the Torgue Shotgun with the belt magazine type.

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  10. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    6. velj

    This has me losing my absolute shit

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  11. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    Twitter has temporarily banned our founder for allegedly violating rules. It is forcing him to delete a crucial tweet about Deutsche Bank, which will not happen.

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  12. I hate to brag and try my best to stay humble - especially online - but I'm the only who wears a headband in this Planet Fitness. Please no DMs at this time.

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  13. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    1. ruj 2017.

    [my wife to everyone at the pool party] pls don't tell him, he's never known the truth [me loudly as I jump off the diving board] CABIN BALL

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  14. When my younger sister was in elementary school, my mom went in to talk to the kids about Islam and 2 of the thank you notes were pretty slick.

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  15. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    6. velj

    **wakes up, checks mentions** I see that I’m going to be tweeting “wrong guy” a lot today.

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  16. proslijedio/la je Tweet

    He’s an alcoholic writer brought back from the dead. She’s the world’s most beloved musician. Together this unlikely duo must stop a madman before he kills again… this fall in NINE TO DIE.

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  17. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    4. velj

    Bowling alley animations be like

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  18. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. velj

    in 1856 congressman Preston Brooks beat a senator nearly to death for criticizing slavery

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  19. proslijedio/la je Tweet
    5. velj

    Imagine buying a $400 million yacht just to have your spotlight stolen by a floating car

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  20. 6. velj

    For me I lean towards latter but it doesn't ALWAYS work.

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  21. 6. velj

    Fellow fiction audiobooks junkies... When a narrator reads, do you prefer them to stick to the book text with minimal ad-libbing (coughing, sneezing, grogginess, et Al) or make it like a one man show?

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