Tweets

You blocked @KylePlantEmoji

Are you sure you want to view these Tweets? Viewing Tweets won't unblock @KylePlantEmoji

  1. Pinned Tweet
    9 Jun 2018

    Flight attendant: Before landing, please make sure all small electronic items are secure Me: *whispering to my tamagotchi* do you feel safe, bud?

    Show this thread
    Undo
  2. 3 hours ago

    Mormons sound like YouTubers desperate to not get demonetized Holy shhhhhhoooot y'all, I did not expect this clusterf-.... This cluster of a situation to get so frickin intense. I mean GO-lly gee whiz. What a freakin gosh darn piece of.. work

    Undo
  3. 8 hours ago

    If my daughter became the next Shakira, I would be immeasurably proud

    Show this thread
    Undo
  4. 8 hours ago

    Being sex trafficked and dancing are the same thing, to me

    Show this thread
    Undo
  5. 10 hours ago

    This tweet is dedicated to I love you and I hope you celebrate heartily

    Show this thread
    Undo
  6. 10 hours ago

    I love Andy Reid. I love Mahomes. I'm so happy

    Show this thread
    Undo
  7. 10 hours ago

    Please disregard all my tweets I haven't been hacked or anything they just suck

    Undo
  8. 10 hours ago
    Undo
  9. 10 hours ago

    When my team gets 5 yards: 5 yards is good. It is progress. A feat. When the other team gets 5 yards: 5 yards is nothing. A baby could get 5 yards. Stop cheering.

    Undo
  10. 11 hours ago

    Call me old fashioned but I was raised to take care of my wife Give her organs, etc

    Undo
  11. 12 hours ago

    [Shakira voice] Tsamina mina eh eh [Fozzie Bear voice] Waka waka eh eh

    Undo
  12. 12 hours ago

    Unrelated: that Mi Gente remix fuckin slapped

    Show this thread
    Undo
  13. 12 hours ago

    Surely she's not STILL Jenny from the block

    Show this thread
    Undo
  14. 12 hours ago

    "how could they think babynut is a good idea," I tweet, helping it trend My feed is filled with babynut Jokes about babynut Complaining about babynut Say what you will about them, planters is playing the game well

    Undo
  15. Feb 2

    My dog, snoozing next to me in bed He wakes up, almost startled He looks me in the eyes I touch his head He farts a cloud that would kill an entire greenhouse And immediate falls back asleep

    Undo
  16. Feb 1

    I have to say, a minute in, I'm incredibly disappointed

    Show this thread
    Undo
  17. Feb 1

    What is the sexiest wood

    Show this thread
    Undo
  18. Retweeted
    10 Aug 2019

    I made some offhanded comment about hating how I looked in front of my nephew, and he looked at me and said "just because you would change parts of something doesn't mean you can't love it" And I was like wow, making up this story about a fake kid really changed my perspective

    Undo
  19. Feb 1
    Undo
  20. Retweeted
    Feb 1
    Undo
  21. Feb 1

    My conspiracy theory is that Miranda Cosgrove never wanted a music career, but then School of Rock blew up and implied that she couldn't sing, so she launched a whole musical project to convince the public otherwise

    Undo

Loading seems to be taking a while.

Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

    You may also like

    ·