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penguin on right: “i need to tell you something” penguin on left: “okay?” penguin on right: “i don’t eat fish” penguin on left:pic.twitter.com/Jy3Ch4XOqo
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settle an argument, you’re sharing a pizza, do you: - take Slice 1 (because it’s the next slice) or - take Slice 2 (because you took a few seconds to decide it’s the best slice)pic.twitter.com/3Snv0Gr25z
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This is the plant based meal being given to all koalas at the London Zoo this year. No option with meat at all. No choice. Welcome to England in 2020 where vegan extremists rule.


pic.twitter.com/Ra0tQ1x9G9
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when your son won’t stop singing songs he learnt from a fucking warthogpic.twitter.com/p8qM1It9KW
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sometimes you actually do get what you want in lifepic.twitter.com/C7ljELWAeC
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photographer: "pose with the animals boris" boris: "how?" photographer: "like a normal human person" boris:pic.twitter.com/oB1HaIUfjl
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if you think you have bad luck this guy won burgers for life at 104 years oldpic.twitter.com/AqyjQi2Zif
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me: “i can’t wait to have the house all to myself” me with the house all to myself:pic.twitter.com/msuVCbpkW0
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does anyone know what they’re smoking at the Wish factory?pic.twitter.com/xVjqcqpzc5
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