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KeatonPatti's profile
Keaton Patti
Keaton Patti
Keaton Patti
Verified account
@KeatonPatti

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Keaton PattiVerified account

@KeatonPatti

I've written for @NewYorker, @Marvel, @TheOnion, @ComedyCentral, @McSweeneys, but mainly for you, the reader. 👇Check out my bot book!

linktr.ee/IForcedABot
Joined January 2012

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    Keaton Patti‏Verified account @KeatonPatti 13 Jun 2018

    I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Olive Garden commercials and then asked it to write an Olive Garden commercial of its own. Here is the first page.pic.twitter.com/CKiDQTmLeH

    11:07 AM - 13 Jun 2018
    • 110,429 Retweets
    • 314,755 Likes
    • laricel quem é que liga? Theuz naju Fora Bolsonaro Genocida St. Jimmy ♍ pretty neat gal Shaun Elson Paradigmeyes
    5,474 replies 110,429 retweets 314,755 likes
      1. Keaton Patti‏Verified account @KeatonPatti 14 Jun 2018

        Hey @olivegarden, let me know if you want to use this.

        74 replies 210 retweets 8,924 likes
        Show this thread
        Thanks. Twitter will use this to make your timeline better. Undo
        Undo
      1. New conversation
      2. Michael Donohoe‏Verified account @donohoe 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @KeatonPatti @dcousineau

        1000 hours = 3,600,000 seconds which means you uncovered 250,000 unique Olive Garden commercials (avg commercial is 15 seconds long)

        14 replies 3 retweets 168 likes
      3. David Neal‏ @WalrusWinks 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @donohoe @KeatonPatti @dcousineau

        Dooh. You never see a commercial just once.

        0 replies 0 retweets 26 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. Galarian Holly Green‏ @winnersusedrugs 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @KeatonPatti

        @thefilmgoer there's always a tell. "What could be considered food"

        1 reply 0 retweets 64 likes
      3. Matt Brennan‏Verified account @thefilmgoer 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @winnersusedrugs

        "Tell" meaning it's a human fabrication, not a bot's?

        2 replies 0 retweets 14 likes
      4. Show replies
      1. New conversation
      2. Biscuit Extra Buttra‏ @BiggestBiscuit 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @KeatonPatti @realBJP

        "Wet voice" will haunt my dreams.

        1 reply 3 retweets 133 likes
      3. Grumpy Potato‏ @TiredTater 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @BiggestBiscuit @KeatonPatti @realBJP

        pic.twitter.com/wPuvSynXqU

        0 replies 0 retweets 4 likes
      4. End of conversation
      1. New conversation
      2. erin, known Pennsylvanian‏Verified account @ByErinWeaver 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @KeatonPatti

        @xor this is rivaling train bot for best bot

        3 replies 0 retweets 67 likes
      3. Parker Higgins‏Verified account @xor 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @ByErinWeaver @KeatonPatti

        in a clean competition @choochoobot wins every time... this bot is doping

        2 replies 1 retweet 82 likes
      4. Show replies
      1. This Tweet is unavailable.
      2. Helen Rosner‏Verified account @hels 13 Jun 2018
        Replying to @JessicaValenti @KeatonPatti

        Oh my god

        4 replies 2 retweets 627 likes
      3. Show replies

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