Keaton PattiOvjeren akaunt

@KeatonPatti

I've written for , , , , , and perform at . You may remember me from the previous sentence.

Vrijeme pridruživanja: siječanj 2012.

Tweetovi

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  1. Prikvačeni tweet

    I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of Olive Garden commercials and then asked it to write an Olive Garden commercial of its own. Here is the first page.

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  2. Prikaži ovu nit
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  3. Never thought I'd see Cookie Monster getting ratio'd, but here we are.

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  4. Hey , let me know if you want to use this.

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  5. Prikaži ovu nit
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  6. I forced a bot to watch over 1,000 hours of the Tonight Show and then asked it to write an episode of the Tonight Show of its own. Here is the first page.

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  7. You: There's no such thing as a stupid question. Me:

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  8. Another great used bookstore find!

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  9. I bet PaRappa the Rapper's parents regret not naming him PaDocta.

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  10. IMPORTANT: When you do your taxes, make sure you check out the voluntary options at the end!!!

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  11. 5. velj

    The Internet: History books in 10 years will be Schiff staring down Republicans, Pelosi tearing up the speech, and Trump in handcuffs!!! History Books in 10 Years: 95% World War II, 4% World War I, 1% JFK might've fucked Marilyn Monroe, we don't really know for sure.

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  12. 5. velj

    I already know how I'll leave New York. I'll pay a strange man $8 in cash to get on one of those unmarked buses near Port Authority on 42nd st and it will drive me to the version of Narnia where everyone is on meth. I'll be so happy.

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  13. 5. velj

    *sees a Wendy's* Holy shit that Twitter account has a store???

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  14. 4. velj

    wtf how was this old GE ad allowed in magazines???

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  15. 4. velj

    If there's anything more punk rock than drinking DayQuil at night, I don't wanna know.

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  16. 3. velj
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  17. 3. velj

    The microwave was invented after an engineer walked through a radar testing room with frozen Hungry Man Chipotle BBQ Sauced Boneless Chicken Wyngz TV dinners in each of his pant's 6 pockets and the machines cooked his pants food. This is also how the internet was invented.

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  18. 3. velj

    This seems kinda rude.

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  19. 3. velj

    wtf are these ads???

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  20. 2. velj

    I feel bad for this guy who lost custody of his kids at an Outback Steakhouse.

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  21. 2. velj

    I honestly thought it'd be higher than 725,902...

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